So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
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