Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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