i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
