I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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