go do what you do best...puke behind churches
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
