he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
