i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize