I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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