I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Ketchup is God's man juice
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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