Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
