Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Randomize
