Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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