Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
