her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
