Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
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