i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I'm always down for nudity.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
