i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize