I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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