why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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