Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
She announced her abortion via fbk
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
