Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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