Don't you send me to vm
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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