I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
