we need to drink 2009 down the drain
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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