Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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