would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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