I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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