After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
how do flat chested girls get laid?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
