Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Randomize
