I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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