so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Randomize
