Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
