She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
