Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
