morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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