Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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