I only kidnapped one of them. chill
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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