Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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