Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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