Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
