I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize