Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
My balls are so social today.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
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