Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
