this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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