3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Randomize
