I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
