my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
