you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
