i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
40s are totally the cure
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
