haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
